Navkiran Kaur Mann reflects on her Nestival Residency

I started my Nestival Residency with a sense of apprehension. Do I call myself an artist? As a person I am many things. I asked myself, does this label fit me? Do I belong in the arts? As a Brown woman I rarely see people who look like me in the arts.

I am the only person in my family who has pursued a career in the arts and I have lacked role models and sponsors, people of colour along the way. I’ve had to look inside for frames of reference and internal blueprints of how to navigate this unfamiliar world to find my place. I believe in working for what you have, something which has been handed down to me by my immigrant parents who came to the UK by invitation of the British Empire to find that they were not wanted nor welcome. The concept of being given a thousand pounds just to write blew my mind. Just to exist. Just to think. 

Walking into the Nest, I found a very warm welcome and a sense that I brought value to the place. There were spaces to have conversations with different artists and with the Talking Birds team. There was a blue room and a space with a desk and silence which was all for me. I was still a bit taken aback by all this provision and resource. I came with a game plan. I am writing my first poetry collection and so I brought flip chart paper, colourful pens and spent time thinking through the structure of my book. Mornings were spent thinking through the chapters and how I’d arrange them and how they made sense. Lunchtimes often meant going to the local chippy with another artist in residence Kim Hackleman and talking about different poetic forms from haikus to sestinas to sonnets. We shared some of our new work over chips and it was a necessary part of the day to have a sense of connection and understanding.

My afternoons were spent writing. Challenging myself to write and create dozens of new poems and relishing the opportunity to have headspace for new ideas. In the silence, I wrote a lot. More than I thought was possible.

In the evenings, I’d share my new material online or at open mics with trusted friends to test it out. I’d get feedback and then use it to improve my second drafts and final edits during the following day of my residency. Having 10 days just to think about my book gave me the kick start I needed. Writing a book is one of my ultimate life goals and having a space to think without pressure was transformative.